Letter To My Son

Barrett,

Having thought about this letter for weeks now, I still find myself at a loss for how to begin. How exactly do you address the new normal? How do you capture, in something as limited as language, just how immensely one person can radically alter your entire life? How do you properly contextualize not only a new living soul, but one that will be connected to you for every second of the rest of your days?

I guess by saying welcome, son.

Your mother and I were not always sure we were meant to have children. But, as I’m sure you will grow to realize, God often chuckles at the ways we forecast our own lives. Now that you’re here, of course, could it have been any other way? It seems clear that we were all meant for each other. God saw fit to give us a beautiful son, and just as your mother and I learn how to be parents for the first time, I would offer you some thoughts about being our child – some things that I hope you hold onto and remember forever.

What I want you to know first is just how much your mother went through to get you here. Believe me, I was there. I had a front row seat for all thirty-two hours of her labor and I witnessed firsthand her absolutely unwavering, relentless love for you. Before she ever saw your face, she fought for you like a lioness. You have a warrior for a mother – one that is willing to endure pain like you and I will never know along with the disappointment, frustration, and unmet expectations of a delivery that in no way went according to plan. If you are ever tempted to doubt the undying love your mother has for you and against all reason and rationality struggle to find some evidence, I will always be here to remind you. You may never realize the depth of her love for you, Bear, until, God-willing, you get to witness the birth of your own child. But until then, never doubt it.

And that is my commitment to you, son: that your mother and I will always strive to provide a home for you where you never have reason to doubt. You have been born into a world that would have you believe that doubt is a virtue, even in the face of undeniable evidence. This world will want you to doubt the very reality of the things you will see with your own eyes and hear with your own ears. It will try to get you to reject logical conclusions, clear reality and obvious truth. It will tell you that up is down and black is white. It will tell you that you alone make the ultimate determination of what is good for your life. It will tell you that your own desires and impulses matter more than facts. It will tell you, in no uncertain terms, that you are the god of your own world.

This world, my son, will only ever lie to you.

And it will never stop lying. Until the day you breathe your last, it will lie, distort, corrupt, and deceive.

It will lie to you about the purpose and meaning of your life, about why you are here. It will lie to you about the most important things in your life, things like truth, love, and destiny. It will lie to you about money, about sex, about success, about relationships, about identity, about reality itself. In the ways that you are special, it will tell you that you aren’t and in the ways that you are strong, it will tell you that you are weak.  It will lie to you about what it means to be a man. And, most important of all, it will lie to you about your God, your Savior, and the living hope that is rightfully yours because of what He has done for you.

This world, my son, only ever wants things from you. It wants nothing for you. It will never stop trying to convince you of the truth of its lies in order that you might join in the conditioning of others to its deceit, as well. Resist it always, Barrett. There will be times when it is the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do, but resist it. Fight it. Because what good will it do you, son, to acquire the whole world if it costs you your soul in the end?

Always remember those words, son: in the end. All things are headed somewhere and where they’re headed must be taken into consideration if you’re ever going to understand them. Never forget about in the end.

To help combat all of this, your mother and I will never lie to you. It is my earnest hope and prayer that you never hear a false word out of our mouths. By the grace of God, may it never be. Because truth matters, Bear. More than anything else, truth and love matter. God is love and Christ is the truth and you cannot have one without the other. You cannot love a person if you insist on lying to them. For this reason, our home will always be a place of truth and love for you, and hopefully, in that, a refuge from the catastrophic holocaust of lies that takes place every single day in this world.

But it is in this broken, incoherent world that you must find your place. God has put you here with us for a reason. And while the exact details will most likely always remain a mystery to everyone but Him, we will seek His council on what He might have you do while you’re here. The world will never tire of telling you what you should do or how you should do it, but tune it out for the sake of the voice of God. He promises wisdom if you ask Him for it and rest if you seek it from Him – take Him up on the offer, son.

Because if you were at all impacted by the way your mother fought to bring you into this world – and you should be – you won’t believe what the God who created you has done for you to save you from it. I can’t wait to tell you all about it and I do hope that you listen. Every other aspect of your life hinges upon whether or not you listen. And, believe me, your mother and I and plenty of other people continue to pray that you seek the God who laid down His life for you, the God who intended you before He ever spoke a molecule of physical creation into existence, and the God who holds the keys to joy, hope, love, and eternity in His hand if you will but take them. He is the point of your life, Barrett. More than anything else, He is the point. He is the reason you are here, He is the reason you have all that you have, and He is the purpose for which you were made.

Seek Him, son. Resist the world and seek Him. This more than anything else is what I want for you, and your mother and I will do all that we can to demonstrate it every minute of your life. Along the way, come what may, I promise there will be fun times, laughter, great music, and beauty the likes of which you can’t possibly even conceive yet. We will experience so much together, Barrett. The ride of your life will be an interesting one, of that I have absolutely no doubt.

I can’t wait to show it to you, little man.